Drink. Stare. Laugh.

Yep, that is the way it goes. On a lads night out - we follow this proven 'Circle of Lash'

Definitely for the sobre part of any night I reckon. Up until about the 4th or 5th drink. Us guys stand in a circle, usually in exactly the same stance.

Left hand goes into the left pocket (You can also just tuck your thumb into the pocket, that is also accepted).

Right hand holds the Bottle/Can/Glass. At any height between the chest or just above the waist. Unless Tony is pulling a Posemaster pose, and has an empty glass upside down above his head.

Once you are into this traditional position, it can start from any of the above 3 options. But once it has started, its pretty much guaranteed to go in order from that point. For arguments sake (Which is my way of saying I can't be arsed to go through them all) lets say we start with 'Drink'.

So, chances are that when you are in a group of lads, when one drinks, the rest drink. When we go out, we do tend to buy in rounds, and we usually do buyers choice. So most of the time we all have the same beverage.  Unless we are on Lager. As Jenks likes to drink Bitter. Apparently it goes down better. Shame he doesn't. So I've heard. Or should I say so Dans heard. Or should I say, so Tony's seen.  So they say.

So, after the Drink part, we move onto 'Stare'. Again, usually, we will all stare at the same thing, or all stare at something different. Maybe the skin head who's just walked in with his striped polo neck shirt, walking like they've shat themselves. We could be all looking at the slightly overweight girl hanging off the pole on the dance floor, wondering which is gonna give way first - her hand, or the ceiling.  Maybe me and Dan have seen a ridiculously fit girl walk in, and we both stare blatantly until she looks at us, at which point we both wince and pretend to feel sick - just to properly ruin her night. 

To go off slightly on a side note - this is one of my favourite things to do. Ruin womens' nights. This tends to happen after I've had a few beers - but I love telling women they have shit hair, or they look like they got dressed in the dark. Its great fun, but risky.

Anyways, so we've all stared for approx 5-20 seconds. Usually at this point, we all realise what everyone else is looking at, so then comes the 'Laugh' part.

This part can also include some talking. However - I'm sure you've all been in the same position I have. You are in a bar/club, talking to someone you know - or just met. They are in full blown conversation with you. They are properly into it - and you are stood there nodding along, or agreeing. I say this - cos as I'm sure you all know - I'm usually standing there with no fucking idea what so ever, what they are talking about.

Its too fucking loud in there. So its easier to just nod and agree, than to ask them to consistently lean in 6mm from your Ear drum to try and get you to understand some stupid insignificant piece of information no one gives a shit about anyway.  
There's just no point. I've had to say to people that I didn't hear them, and they've leaned in close like 4 or 5 times. I can't ask again, because I've not been diagnosed with retardation and I'm not gonna have anyone else admit me. So after a while I just pretend I understand. If I say something that doesn't make sense to what they asked - you can easily just fuck off to the toilet and by the time you are done, the conversation has moved on.

So there we have it. Drink - Stare - Laugh.

Next time you are on a night out - if you haven't noticed it before, you will now. Its Science.